Sunday, October 31, 2010

30 Days of Truth: Day 1

Something you love about yourself

You'd think this would be easier than it feels right now. Something I love about myself.

I guess it's not easy because I'm not going to bullshit my way out of it. I'm not going to say, I'm a mom and I'm better for it, yadda, yadda-yadda...

Ooooh! I do have something I love about myself.

I am extremely loving and forgiving.  It's funny. I don't think this is something that everyone who JUST MEETS me knows. I've heard I can come across as arrogant or a know-it-all.

But inside? It's quite the opposite. I'm emotional mush.

I feel that the world is not forgiving enough. I feel so bad for people, how worried they get when they "screw up" (usually in their eyes). And then, they come to you. They're prepared to grovel or beg or be all I'll-go-hide-in-the-corner-until-you-aren't-pissed-about-this. Or they ignore and avoid you because they can't deal with what the fall-out might be. But then, BAM! It's okay. Don't worry.  Really, people make mistakes. This would be a silly reason to be upset or get angry.

I don't like the idea of someone that isn't loved. I probably call too many people love, or hon, or sweetie. But, I mean it.  I just. love. people.

Maybe it's a consequence of my childhood/sad story/lack of daddy/just want acceptance growing up. I just want to be there to support every human being I can. I am only one person. I am not sure I can change the whole world. But I can change my world. And the people who love me enough to stay in it with me.

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